The OY OY sound

When we bought the house we had no kids. We knew that eventually kids would fill the "extra" bedrooms and so I decorated the hallway bathroom that would certainly belong to the kids in the "rubber ducky" motif. Sophisticated, I know.

Because Guero does wake up calls for most roosters in the morning, he started using that bathroom some time ago so that he did not wake up the rest of the house while he was getting ready.

For his birthday this year, I redecorated.

I got rid of all of the rubber ducky toothbrush holders, bathmats, see through shower curtain and trash cans. They were, to say the least emasculating.

I replaced it with a much more masculine, plain brown and blue motif.

Big mistake.

Now he owns that bathroom and he reminds us frequently that there are "No girls allowed"!

Last night we came home and put JJ down for bed. Looking forward to watching the videos that I rented, I wanted to be very comfortable and decided to take a nighttime shower.

I committed the ultimate crime - showered in "DADDY'S BATHROOM".

After I turned on the water to get the shower going, Daddy went on a (pretend) baby temper tantrum and said that he wanted a big piece of paper so that he could make a sign, hang it on the door and hopefully then, we would remember to STAY OUT OF HIS BATHROOM!

Karina and I laughed at him, I shut the door and got in the shower. Surely I was full of soap when Karina knocked. I hear her muffled voice through the door, "Mom, what makes the OY OY sound?"

Uh, well your great-grandmother for one.

I was totally confused.

When I finally got out of the shower and opened the door, she was standing right there waiting for me.

All by herself (with a little help from Daddy who told her the letters that make the OY OY sound) Karina made a sign that said B.O.Y.S.. She got the B and S all by herself!

Oy Vey. I am sure her great-grandparents are thrilled to pieces!

And the winner is...

My brother-in-law, Wil and (by default... so sorry) his lovely wife Jessica!
They have won an all expense paid night out with US! Lucky!
(Wil, I am going to need to borrow your bank card in order to make this authentic!)

Here are the answers in case you were wondering:

1. Turner and Hooch (this has been a favorite line of mine for so long... God, send me Canteloupes! Priceless!)

2. "Never interrupt me..." - As Good As it Gets. We quote this movie A LOT in our house.

3. "...fog as thick as peanut butter..." - Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer - My favorite movie

4. "It is no concern of mine whether your family has... food" - Emperor's New Groove

5. "Hate Hate Hate..." - The Grinch (with Jim Carrey), a great movie for quoting.

6. "don't just pack crap, Jeff" - Home Alone

7. "...my grandmother has more attitude..." - As Good As it Gets, love that movie.

8. "My father was the shaman of his tribe..." - The Birdcage

9. "Just because I talk with an accent..." - A Walk in the Clouds

10. "Bleeding hearts of the world unite" - The Grinch

11. "How do you write women so well?" - As Good As it Gets - again

12. "I eat breakfast 300 yards from 4000 Cubans..." A Few Good Men... Rated R snuck in there. We only watch it on TV?

13. "Can you drive him?" - As Good As it Gets

14. "wafting, wafting" - some dumb Mike Myers movie. As soon as I hear Guero say those words, I start yelling "STOP STOP!" it makes me nauseous to even think about it.

15. "...going to a cemetary with your toothbrush..." - The Birdcage

16. "... I want my twelve..." - Men of Honor

17. "...the past does hurt..." - Lion King

18. "... a man dressed as a bat..." Batman ... duh.

19. "...you wouldn't happen to have a match would you?..." I believe Tom Hanks says this to Wilson in Cast Away.

20. "A Navy diver is not a hero..." - Men of Honor.

By the way, we have decided that in doggy years, Elvis is old enough to watch the kids. Hopefully he won't lay on top of them... bad babysitting policy.

better... and with prizes

LAME-o

Thank goodness my life was not on the line. Because apparently Jessica and Alison watch a bunch hoity toity LAME-o movies that I have never heard of, and I couldn't play their movie quote games to save my life.

Guero and I, however, are way more fun and watch real people movies. The kind that most normal people watch. No Brainers. The problem is that we don't watch many movies. Our library is... limited. (So, that just makes us smarter than those other two because we don't waste our time on anything hoity or toity) We do, however, love to quote movies... just the same movies... over... and over... and over. (I know I have mentioned this affectionately in a previous post)

Our movie quote game is going to be way more fun, too, because if you can get the most correct answers - I will give you a huge prize!

So, This is our movie quote game... with some of the same movies being repeated for good measure:

*disclaimer, we do not watch rated R movies, but we do watch movies with colorful language, so if you are offended by the words H-E-double hockey sticks, or S.T.U.P.I.D. (spell it out so the little ones don't hear), please do not continue*

1. Forget it, I wish it was snowing. No, no. I wish it was hailing. I wish it was hailing, God. Send me hail the size of cantaloupes.

2. Never, never interrupt me, okay? Not if there's a fire, not even if you hear the sound of a thud from my home and one week later there's a smell coming from there that can only be a decaying human body and you have to hold a hanky to you face because the stench is so thick that you think you're going to faint. Even then, don't come knocking. Not on this door. Not for ANY reason. Do you get me, sweetheart?

3. This fog's as thick as peanut butter!
You mean pea soup.
You eat what you like, and I'll eat what I like!

4. It is no concern of mine whether or not your family has... what was it again?
Peasant: Umm... food?
Ha! You should have thought of that before you became peasants.

5. Hate, Hate, hate. Hate, hate, hate. Double Hate. LOATHE ENTIRELY!

6. On packing for travel to another country:
(sister) I hope you didn't just pack crap, Jeff.
(Brother) Shut up Linnie. You know what I should pack? Toilet paper and water.

7. I grew up in hell! My grandmother has more attitude than you!

8. My father was the shaman of his tribe and my mother was the high priestess.
So why the hell did they move to New Jersey?
I don't know, they're so stupid.

9. Just because I talk with an accent doesn't mean I think with an accent.

10.Bleeding hearts of the world UNITE.

11.How do you write women so well?
I think of a man, and I take away reason and accountability.

12. I eat breakfast 300 yards from 4000 Cubans who are trained to kill me, so don't think for one second that you can come down here, flash your badge, and make me nervous.

13.Can you drive him?
Think (enter any nationality or heritage in our home), and get serious!

(I cannot believe I am putting this one in here... but if you knew how many times I have heard Guero quote this line... every time I cook something bad...)
14.Hmmm, wafting, wafting. Ok, analysis. Ooh, smells like carrots in throw-up! Oh that could gag a maggot!

15.Los Copa? There's nothing in Los Copa but a cemetery.
I know, that's why I'm packing light.
Oh I see, so you're going to a cemetery with your toothbrush. How Egyptian.

16. You'll disregard that order this is my detail.
Damn it Cookie move your a@$
I want my twelve!

17. What did you that for?
It doesn't matter its in the past!
Yeah but it still hurts.
Yees the past does hurt.
But the way I see it you can either run from the past or learn from
it.

18. What kind of the world do we live in? when a man dressed up as a bat
gets all the media huh?
This town needs an enima!

19. You wouldn't happen to have a match would you? The air go to it! The air
got to it! Aha. Look what I've created. I have made FIRE

20. A Navy diver is not a hero he is a salvage expert. If its sunk he brings
it up if its lost he find it.

Think you won? Wanna know what the big prize is?
Well, You my friend, have won an all expense included movie night out with none other than your's truly and my hilarious husband. We will treat you to dinner at a fabulous restaurant of your choice, and then a, no more than PG-13 movie, of course.
fine print: expenses will be paid by recipient of said prize. Choose wisely - hilarious husband is a big eater.

death defying

Yesterday we went to Wildlife World Zoo on a field trip with Karina's class.
While we were sitting and waiting for the choo choo train, JJ had an idea.

"Sissy, this is boring, let's see if the Lion's want to eat the stinky peanut butter and Jellies that Mommy brought for our lunch?"

"No, brother, don't do it! Remember what happened when we gave her chicken to the black bears and they were so appalled they went all vegetarian"

"Shhhh, Sissy. That never happened."

JJ's new friend, Spike. He is coming over for dinner tomorrow. What should I make? Obviously he is on a strict diet... what a physique!

Michael Jackson was at the zoo. He suggested we dangle our babies precariously over the enclosure for the wild beasts that are the giraffes. I told him, "No way!, I am not going to be responsible for this very expensive animal when he tries to swallow JJ whole and chokes to death!"
I did what any responsible parent would do. I left Karina up there by herself to feed the ferocious animals "Giraffe pellets" and I went downstairs to take her picture.
Karina and her school friends... right before they released the piranhas.

It was a fun day. I want to go back real soon.

Carte blanche

In case you have not noticed, we, along with the rest of the entire country are on a strict budget. There are spending limits on top of spending limits in this house. I think I am doing a fair job at keeping it all under control.

I have become a vigilant bargain shopper, penny pincher, coupon clipper. We buy nothing unless it is on sale or has a coupon. I am not impressed with a "fifty percent off" sale. Unless I feel like I stole it (LEGALLY) I cannot feel comfortable buying it.

With that said, my husband is as blind as a bat. He cannot see without his glasses. Whatever his prescription (I know nothing about ophthalmology) he has to wear glasses all day. I have heard the tech at the Lens Crafters at our local mall, say, "Wow, those are some glasses". Now, For the tech to tell him his prescription is high... well, then he must be - blind as a bat.

Every year the subject returns.
"I need new glasses".
This is my philosophy: carte blanche. There are so few things that I will utter those frightening words for.

When it comes to my husband there are only a few things that get that status.
1. Good denim pants. He will ONLY wear Levi's 560's. He needs them for work, and it makes it easier to shop for him. When they go on sale, I buy two pair. I only buy once a year, but I still drop almost 100 bucks on just that one purchase.
2. Good shoes. Ugh. Don't even get me started. It is nearly impossible to find shoes for him, so when he needs them - really you have to settle for whatever you can find - no matter the cost.
3. For Christmas I saw a shirt that he had to have. It was a t-shirt on sale for 38 dollars! 38 dollars! For a t-shirt! He had to have it. Had to. It is black (my favorite color for him), has a cool new superman logo on the front and says "Man of Steel". It was a no brainer. Especially since I had a $20 coupon. Still I paid $18 dollars for a t-shirt! $18 dollars for a t-shirt!

But I digress. Carte blanche and glasses.

I tell him.
husband, you need to buy whatever you love and whatever you need. Don't skimp. They have to be on your face all day every day. They are critically important. I cannot in good conscience, impose budget restraints on something so vital to your daily life.

He does not feel totally comfortable with that rationale. But somehow, he finds the intestinal fortitude and spends and spends and spends. He should. He has to. I make sure it is the one budget request that I never question.

I tell you that, to tell you this:
My kids have been begging for a big cardboard house in the middle of the family room. I said to them, "kids, when I find a coupon for a big cardboard house, I promise you - I will be the first in line."
I contacted all of my friends behind Fry's. None of them knew of a house "for sale".

Then my washing machine died. They saw an opportunity and jumped on it. They played to my weakness.

I caved and bought them this expansive living room mansion...

Fortunately for me, my husband remembered all of those conversations that we had about glasses. When we were at Sears looking for the box, we were lucky enough to find one with a top of the middle of the line washing machine inside.

washing machine: check.
Next item of business... new camera! I wonder, how big is the box for that?

Happy Birthday Joseph Jonah

Go ahead, fawn

I have posted before about how difficult it is to take the kids anywhere. They are so gorgeous and irresistible that I get a lot of people stopping me to tell me how adorable my kids are. I know. Like I always tell Karina (not from personal experience, but in trying to prepare her for what is to come in life),

"Buds, it hurts to be beautiful".

Well, really I tell her that more when I am doing her hair and pulling, and she is freaking out and saying, "Mooooooommmmmy? Why can't I just wear my hair with no ponies?!"

"Buds, it hurts to be beautiful".

Today is JJ's last day to be eleven months old. It will be a sad day. The last day that I will be able to respond to the masses that, "he is eleven months old"

I plan on making a lot of public appearances today.

Since it seems that most of the time you are stopped by elderly folks, I think I will hit Super Wal-mart, Costco and then for dessert - Denny's of Sun City.

Heck, why be modest? I'll will check the phone book for all of the retirement homes in between.

It would be nice, JJ, if it was the last day that I had to tell people, "no, he does not walk yet... he likes being served."

my budding artiste

He found a crayon and drew on the wall.
Well, in a homage to Elephants and chimps... given paintbrushes to raise money for the wildlife trapped in zoos...

He was using the crayon to bang on the wall and art happened.

Hang on, I need to put magic erasers on my shopping list.

and Spiderman birthday cake.

and a purple and green HULK pinata.

a baby's nightmare

JJ still wakes up at five in the morning, but in the last few weeks we have trained him to take a bottle and go back to sleep for a few hours. It is amazing what I can accomplish in those few hours... like blogging.

This morning was no exception. He woke up at five.

But, this morning... he woke up really upset. He had a baby nightmare. I could tell because I am his mom. It is a pitiful cry that says, "please, help me Mom, somebody has done me horribly wrong."

It is hard to be a baby.

You suffer so many injustices. It is hard to know exactly which one of those created this nightmare.

Was he dreaming about pulling himself up on the dishwasher door so that he can press it's many light-up buttons, only to have the door mysteriously pop open and hit him on the head?

Was he dreaming about watching Sissy run out the back door, swinging it shut behind her, leaving him on the inside... by himself... well, worse... with MOMMMY!

Was he dreaming about watching Sissy race his new Tonka from one end of the house to the other... desperately trying to catch her and instead she, adding injury to insult, races right by him running his fingers over.

Was he dreaming about watching Daddy eating nice juicy barbecue while he sits in his highchair with fruit and baby-o's.

He could have been dreaming that he was a thirty year old wife and mommy, wishing she could make time stand still so that she could have a little more time with her squishy baby who so defiantly decides to become a one year old boy on Saturday?

...the least I could do

I won a great prize (delivered to my house in a big box!) from this blog:
good blog - great giveaways!

In case you are curious ?
I won a basket full of goodies from Progresso soup! Inside my big box was a *well a basket* and lots of kitchen utensils, and a filing system for recipe cards and a coupon for a free Progresso soup!

Awesome!

There is a new giveaway going on to win a great puzzle book, but don't enter that one, I want to win it! :o)

in light of my last post... is there any word in the English language sweeter than the word FREE?

Something special

I have had a severe lack of inspiration for blogging. Ideas only come when I am feeling sentimental. I have not felt warm and fuzzy in weeks.

Christmas was beautiful because special things did occur.

Of course we performed the entire nativity with my in-laws on Christmas eve. The Spirit was evermore present through the biting cold and drizzling rain because my husband built a bonfire in front of the manger.

My family was far more generous with the kids than was prudent for them. They definitely "gave of their essence". They really have a lot of love for the kids, and I appreciate that. My sister cooked breakfast for all of us and it was delicious.

You could not miss, however, the underlying sadness that every one was experiencing. Every one had some other hardship weighing heavily on their minds. Whether it was their health, or the health of a child or most noticeably the lack of finances... everybody was sad.

My birthday was celebrated over and over in so many generous and thoughtful ways... but that never changed the fact that I turned thirty.

After the first of the year, finances for everybody went from bad to catastrophic in some cases. Sadness abounds.

There is however, opposition in all things. To prove this, I got one unexpected and awesome birthday present yesterday.

(muchos thank-yous to two fantastic friends - Briana and Alecia and one wonderful husband)

They gave me a ticket to WICKED for my birthday. How awesome is that?!


This may be THE story about seeing "opposition" in all things.

I think it is only fair to also mention that Sarah generously told me that if she had Costco coupons - she would give them ALL to me. I know she meant it.
And Kristi did not tell me that I am crazy, even though she had ample evidence to the contrary.
Lily also offered to watch my kids if I had to go back to work, even though she has five of her own.

Mom so generously gave me a new pair of shoes that I cannot decide which ones to pick and have to go back to the store when I have "slept on it"
The frontrunner:


Tita taught JJ to drink from a straw. We were so giddy that we took a picture (with Lily's camera) He then promptly refused to return the lemonade to it's rightful owner.

My sister may finally get a job she loves.

Guero is cleaning up our beautiful backyard so that it can be returned to it's glorious state.

I am savoring every last drop of a free tank of gas that he won in a raffle.

I am now the proud owner of enough diapers to last at least a month.

Even though I am fairly certain that most of my friends would never spend this much on shoes... These are the cutest baby shoes I have ever seen, and it surprised me that I got some amount of joy from just looking at them... and attempting not to look at the price... which I cannot match.
Very cutest baby shoes

I have a testimony that while everything going on in the universe seems chaotic and out of control at the moment, it is in control... just not mine.

The joy of our lives

What is the good news today?

JJ's Joy: The vacuum. (pictured above - after an escape from Grandma who was feeding him Gerber squash)
Karina was petrified. JJ thinks it is the best toy we ever got him. Karina still dives for the couch as soon as she sees me go to the closet to get the vacuum out. JJ screams for joy when he sees the it, and makes it very hard to get the job done because he chases, and tries to jump on top of the vacuum. He is fascinated by the suction. He wants you to try to suck up his clothes or fingers.

Karina is the most beautiful kid that ever graced the state of Arizona. At least that is what we are told. She is so smart. She is working hard in preschool and studying harder for the bar exam.

Found great new website - abrandnewyear.lds.org

A new car: $20,000
A bigger backyard: $150,000
A case lot sale at the grocery store and two of the very cutest kids: priceless